I am so confused. Everyone has their own ability to be their own level of perfection. I try my best to please everyone in my surroundings. I’m hurting, and it’s starting to show. My fake smiles, aren’t fake anymore, their not smiles at all. My perfection isn’t much, although I try. The smile I wear on my face everyday, the laughter I let flow from inside of me, and the energy I find that continues to build, it’s coming to an end. I’m reckless but harmless. I just want to know if others level of perfection is good enough without trying, why isn’t mine good enough while I am trying? I guess it just shows that perfection is overrated, with the exception of some. I know it’s not fair, and getting over it never seems to work, but I don’t see other options, although I’m sure it’s just like a lost object, always right in front of you.
Behind my smile is a broken heart. Behind my laugh, I’m falling apart. I’m the anon who hides behind written art. I’m dazed, and confused. Lost and annoyed. Thinking I was finally pointed in the right direction, but when I close my eyes, there is more then one arrow pointing in every direction. With all the mixed signals, I get a head rush, a large thump continues-sly pounding in my head, and it doesn’t go away. It feels like there will never be an end. You only live until your forever is up. Knowing forever is impossible scares me. Realizing, everything comes to an end, seems so tragic.