Sometimes I wish I didn’t have to act like I was happy all the time. I wish I could walk the halls at school and the smile I put on my face was real or when I walk down the street with the sun on my face. Throughout life instead of convincing other people I’m happy, I want to convince myself I’m happy. Happiness is a hard quality to have in life because it’s an emotion that you want to have, but your mind controls your mood, and your mood comes from full emotion you put into your mood, as much as you might want to control it, you can’t. For once I wish I could look at myself in the mirror and tell myself the qualities I have as a person are amazing, and I am happy to be me. I can’t do that because I would be lying. Although I’m not happy throughout most of the days I live my life, I can’t stand their and lie to myself in such a harsh manner. I wish everything about me would change, so I can just be happy. Happiness never came, it’s driving me insane.
“The sun glides across the night sky ,
as I look at your face ,
I glance at your eyes ,
we hear nothing but wind brush past our ears ,
I could stay all night with you boy ,
or maybe years ♥”—Amber-Arlene Quinn
I don’t think that people realize how much they can hurt a person by saying the littlest thing such as a promise . They might think it’s just a word , but the word that their saying to you goes into deep emotion and when the stream it flowed threw breaks , so do you . Everyone has made a promise and never kept it , but it only comes to a certain amount of lying until it actually starts to hurt . You made a promise to me , a pinky promise , my expectation of it were unlimited , unfortunately you didn’t just break the promise , you broke me too . I wish you would just talk to me like we use to , make me laugh like you always did , and make me smile at everything you were involved with . I know you meant what you said , because of all the other times you promised me something you always kept it . I’m waiting for that day when you will come and say .. I’m sorry I ever hurt you , I’m sorry I ever lied , I know I want to be with you , please don’t cry , I always loved you , and will ‘till I die . I know this day will never come with this particular person , but I’ll keep my hopes high until I find another guy .